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Skills for Parents
What You Will Learn on this Workshop...
There is an abundance of parenting advice out there, and many claims
about the 'type' of child you will produce if this advice is followed. The premise of Communicating with Kids is that you are the best parent for your child and have no
need of adopting anyone else's 'model', but there are some simple communication principles and skills which can
help you and make life easier. Whether your parenting style is strict or lenient; the key to positive relationships
and confident parenting is clear communication. The principles and skills taught in Communicating with Kids are simple
and easy to put into practice immediately, giving you more confidence in being the parent you are.
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Different Parenting 'Models'
Conflicting
advice; de-mystifying all the evidence and claims
A Definition of 'Communication'
An
understanding of how we communicate; how the way we say something can have the opposite to the intended result; how simple
changes to our language can have a big effect
Acceptable and Unacceptable Behaviour
Looking at usual
methods to encourage the first and discourage the second; exploring more effective alternatives
Whose
Problem?
Knowing whose problem it is, yours or the child's, is the basis for knowing the most useful skills to
use
Strong Feelings
How we respond to our children's strong feelings may make them worse;
learning a new approach which can really help
Our Children's Problems
Recognising over-identification
with our children's feelings; helping them more effectively with their problems
Understanding Authority
The different meanings of 'Authority'; finding an alternative to either the 'authoritarian' approach
at one extreme or a lack of authority at the other
Managing Daily Routines
Making day-to-day
routines easier and quicker to manage, with less confusion amd frustration all round
Challenging Disrespectful
Behaviour
Managing disrespectful treatment from your child in a clear way without becoming disrespectful back
Confronting Unacceptable Behaviour
Challenging your children when they get it wrong in a way that
makes them more willing to get it right
Getting your Own Needs Met
Recognising and taking care
of your own needs to prevent taking frustration out on your child
Repeated Patterns of Behaviour
Dealing with recurring situations that always end in anger or tears no matter what you try
What's
the Deal?
Setting clear conditions before allowing your child to do something to avoid misunderstanding and resentment
Encouraging Respectful Behaviour
Fostering a willingness to be polite and well-mannered without
always having to remind and nag
Being Yourself
Being authentic and sharing who you are outside
the role of parent, fostering greater intimacy and respect
Creating your Family Culture
Deciding
on what kind of family you want to be and getting your children on board to make it happen
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Understanding the two aspects of the parent-child relationship:
Parental Authority and the Human Relationship
The basic 'laws' of communication
The role of words, tone of voice, facial expression and body language
Sending clear messages
Understanding what 'behaviour' is and what it isn't
Alternatives to labelling
Effective v ineffective praise
The 'ownership' of problems
'Roadblocks' to communication
Acknowledging feelings without indulging them
Helping skills
Listening skills and when to use them
The Helping Continuum
Understanding legitimate 'authority'
Guidance
Clear direct instructions
Learning to disengage
Communicating trust and clear expectations
Messages of intent
Expressing personal
boundaries
Statements of self-respect
I-language
Declarative I-messages
Confrontive
I-messages
The language of inclusion
Understanding 'primary' feelings
Clear expression
of needs
Needs v solutions
Preventive messages
Stepping outside the drama
Painting the
picture
Making clear deals
Giving clear information
Expressing
feelings and effects
Self-disclosure
Shared goals
The
language of teamwork
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